Viewing Porn Today

As I was searching through my wordpress reader the other day, I came across something I wasn’t expecting.

The title of my blog is somewhat blunt. It is pretty easy to find on wordpress if you type in masturbation. When I first started writing this blog, I could search that term and find a couple things here and there. There were some disturbing entries that I skipped over, but for the most part nothing that was too inappropriate. Things have changed.

I probably should have known better. This is the world we live in. Sex and porn creeps into all of our social networking systems one way or another. I was searching through my reader trying to find a blog to read, when photos began to show up. With a search term like masturbation you can easily guess the kinds of images I was exposed to.

With my past struggles with pornography, what I saw would be considered mild. But it has been so long since I have viewed any kind of sexual material, that I knew if I kept trying to search in that category I would be in trouble. I immediately typed in “Christian”, and switched to looking for wisdom from fellow believers. My mind shifted, and I was no longer focusing solely on those images. But it was still in the corner of my mind just waiting for the right opportunity. I could sense it and knew I needed prayer.

Just then my husband called me to tell me he was on his way home from work. I immediately told him about the images, that I was fine, but I needed him to pray for me. He prayed, I felt peace, I told him I loved him, and I continued on with life.

There are many reasons as to why I didn’t fall to temptation. Jesus is at the center of them all. He is my rock and my refuge. The more I dwell on him, the easier it is to tear my thoughts away from something that would have once held me captive. It is moments like this that remind me of what He has done for me. I was tempted just enough to know that without him I would have ended that experience the same way I had before I began to lean on Him.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” – 2 Corinthians 5:17  

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4 thoughts on “Viewing Porn Today

  1. “Just then my husband called me to tell me he was on his way home from work. I immediately told him about the images, that I was fine, but I needed him to pray for me. He prayed, I felt peace, I told him I loved him, and I continued on with life.”

    This is an inspiration, and I aspire one day to build a relationship that can be so open and mutual and understanding and supportive as this example says to me. Thanks for sharing.

    • I am extremely thankful for him! But I know we couldn’t be this way on our own. Praying that one day God blesses you with a relationship even better than our own!

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